Notes of a Self-Exiled American

Strange Things I Heard My First Days In Prague

Jason Mashak — Thu, 01 Dec 2011 10:10:00 GMT

I probably went through a full range of reactions when on my first evening walk through Prague’s Staromestke namesti (Old Town Square) I was approached by a man who kept repeating “Cocaine, hashish, marijuana” to me (and certain others) as he made his way through the square, despite a cluster of police just a few meters away (later, I found a facebook group apparently dedicated to this guy).

I had left the “Land of the Free” and arrived in a country that seemingly really was. It seemed that Prague, whether I wanted to partake of such things or not, was the kind of place where laws “to protect” people had not yet begun to control people. I liked that. Immensely.

Like a lot of expats in Prague (and elsewhere), a complicated chain of circumstances (divorce, depression about the state of affairs in the USA, curiosity about family roots, etc.) led to my decision, after only a few days of visiting, to stay (all expats seem to be running from some things, and running to others). Being new in town, I extended the stay at my pension (hostel) until I could find a flat to rent (which took only a few days).

Photo: Spino73

F*ck you

To immerse myself in local culture, I steered clear of tourist and expat places and began tuning my ear to Slavic sounds (it was also easier to tune them out when I wanted to focus on reading or writing).

Everywhere, it seemed, I heard people in relaxed conversations saying to each other “F*ck you.” I wondered if it wasn’t an Irish influence (Irish tend to have dirty mouths), but I eventually asked one of my new Czech bartender friends about it and he laughed, explaining that “Fakt jo” is the Czech and Slovak equivalent of “Really” or “For real” or “No kidding” or “You’re serious” or any of a couple dozen similar responses one can think of in English. “Fakt jo” (sounds like “fukt yo”) means literally “fact, yes?” It turned out these authentic Bohemians weren’t so vulgar and rude after all.

Photo: Bartlec

Blowjob? Blowjob?

One night early in my stay I found myself stumbling down cobblestone streets (this happened several nights, actually), lost, looking for the Vltava River – the landmark I needed to get back to my hostel.

Finally, around 2am, after going in circles through the labyrinth that must have helped create Kafka’s dreams, I pulled out my map and approached a nice-enough-looking lady, middle-aged, perhaps herself a foreigner. “Please, can you tell me where I am on this map?” I asked, pointing first to the map and then gesturing at the buildings around us. To this she responded “Blowjob? Blowjob?” a half dozen times until I finally gave up (turned out I was only a block from the river). I realized then that not all things in Prague were fun and games – there was also a seedy side to this colorful town… just what I needed to be the next Henry Miller.

Charles Square

Real estate or marijuana?

A week or so later, while looking at flats with a Czech reality agent (“reality” is Czech for “real estate”), we were walking through Karlovo namesti (Charles Square) and she asked, “Do you smoke marijuana?” and sat on the next bench, rolled a rather large joint, and lit up. This was serious culture shock for me (coming from a land where mandatory minimum sentencing has put a huge percentage of good citizens behind bars for such petty escapes), as the little old ladies and everyone else walking by didn’t seem to care or even notice.

We didn’t look at any more flats that day, yet somehow, after a brief stint at a Jamaican bar (don’t bother asking which one), we found a flat above a tea room – from a guy who wasn’t even advertising he had one for rent. Prague was really beginning to feel like home, as I had always needed an agent for reality. During the next few weeks, she even invited me to hang out with her and her boyfriend and their friends a few times, which provided several opportunities for contemplating reality.

Photo: Wilhelmja

I had always thought of “The American Dream” as a symbol for Freedom and Opportunity. As these things have been dwindling in the USA for several decades, I was glad to find that, for me at least, I could still find them in, of all places… the former Eastern Bloc.

Local View: Jozef Spodniak's Prague

Jason Mashak — Wed, 11 Nov 2009 09:37:00 GMT

Jozef Spodniak playing the theremin. Photo: Miroslava Nacinova

At 33 years of age, his "Jesus Christ year," Slovak experimental musican Jozef Spodniak has a difficult time describing himself. Educated in Brezno, Slovakia, he hails from the small south-central Slovak village of Liesnica, in the Poltar province. Spodniak moved to Prague seven years ago with his band Ohour, an "intuitive improvisational" endeavor that has participated in various multi-genre experimental performances over the years. I caught up with Spodniak at his rehearsal space near Prague's Old Town Square, where he was reluctant to separate himself from a briefcase full of glowing tubes and oscillators known as a Theremin.

How would you describe your experiences when you first moved to Prague? Were there particular places that made you feel especially welcomed?

Wall-painting of Bohumil Hrabal in Liben. Photo from Wikimedia

Prague felt really free, freer than Slovakia. I don’t do it anymore, but you could smoke marijuana without having to hide or hassle with the police… so Prague offered an authentic bohemian atmosphere [the Czech Republic has two major historical regions, Bohemia and Moravia – thus, the term ‘bohemian’ serves a double meaning here]. Klub Ujezd was one of the first places we hung out when we got to town; we had pretty good experiences there. I’ve since lived in five different Prague neighborhoods, and so far Liben is my favorite – it’s where the writer Bohumil Hrabal lived for a while.

When friends visit from elsewhere, what places do you like to take them?

Extra Action Marching Band at the Roxy. Photo: Dizznan

It depends who it is, what they’re into. Velryba is a great café with lots of books around, but U Sudu has underground tunnels leading like a labyrinth of bars… I like Roxy NoD a lot, as it combines concert venue, experimental art space, café, bar, etc.

Where's the eternal party? What about best places for solitude?

Milada Squat

One place there’s always something going on… I can’t remember the name of it, but inside it has a sign that says “Smallest bar in the world,” with only one table and room inside for about five people, maximum. Prague’s got lots of places tucked away like this. For solitude, Unijazz is quiet, small, and relaxed, and has a music and bookshop, as well. But I also like to walk the dogs on Libensky ostrov (Liben Island), on the Vltava River. Near there is another cool place, Milada Squat, which has a lot of live music and experimental stuff passing through.

What towns do you like to visit for an inexpensive day trip out of Prague?

Karlstein Castle. Photo: Jason Mashak

A village called Dobrichovice, near Karlstein Castle … it has great old villa-style houses and beautiful nature. I’ve got a friend who lives there, which is how I found it. But there are places in Prague’s outskirts I go, like Radotin or Zbraslav, which have great parks (some for hiking) with small pubs, music festivals, concerts… you bump into a lot of folks from the old underground scenes in Czechoslovak history there.

U Pigiho

Hospoda U pigiho (Bar at the Piggy), if you can find it, is a great pub in Zbraslav.

What is the strangest encounter you've had with any of Prague's crazy characters?

Each day brings another one.

You spent the summer of 2008 on the Black Sea in Bulgaria... what did you miss most about Prague while you were there?

Bohemian culture… small pubs with a homey atmosphere to hang out in… a lot of places don’t have that the way Prague does.

The interview was conducted in Slovak, interpreted (and translated back to English) by Miroslava Nacinova.

Go further:

Local view: Bob Stanley's London

Local view: Catherine Sanderson's Paris

Local view: Jerome Weatherald's London

Local view: Lauren Elkin's Paris

Local view: Sebastian Horsley's London

Local view: Gilles Valentin's Istanbul

Local view: Adam Kuban's New York

Local view: Christophe Abric's Paris

Local view: Melissa Maldonado's Berlin

Local view: Maaike Gottschal's Amsterdam

Local View: Dana Boulé's Paris

Keep Economic Crisis Out Of Your Pockets

Jason Mashak — Thu, 05 Feb 2009 10:14:00 GMT

There's no better time to travel than during a global financial meltdown. Price wars between airlines have led to plummeting ticket prices, and posh hotels are practically giving away their beds. Promotions on all kinds of products – ranging from hot chocolate to haute couture - make it possible for even unemployed bankers to get a taste of the good life. We asked our local bloggers to uncover the best deals, and to tell us about the simple and inexpensive pleasures that can always be found in their cities. With cheap tickets and insider advice, there's no reason why a shrinking economy should stop you from expanding your horizons.

Prague

Photo: Smaku

As an expat living in Prague, I’ve seen massive shifts in the exchange rates since late 2006. At that time, long-term expats were already complaining about the changes they’d seen since the 1990s. In finding ways to reduce expenses, discovered a few places in the city center where I can grab a good lunch for less than 100 Czech korun (around 3,5 euro). These are by no means the only places, but they’re the ones I’ve become quite fond of in the last couple years. Note: many places offer 'tourist menus' that cost two to three times as much.

Countless traditional Czech restaurants serve my favorite Czech item, smazeny syr a hranolky (fried cheese and French fries), but when I'm feeling like I don't want to fall asleep right after I eat, I opt for the lighter alternatives. I still get filled up with Czech-style food, I'm able to chase it with a cerne pivo (dark beer), and I don't have to sit among hordes of tourists for lunch.

Prague's Live Music ... Improvise!

Jason Mashak — Wed, 24 Feb 2010 10:35:00 GMT

When you come to a city in which lots of peripheral (non-infrastructural) information has yet to be translated to English, there are two possible reactions: 1) panic, or 2) brace yourself for excitement. Back in the USA, I don’t think I ever went to a concert unless I knew at least some of the particulars about who/what I was going to see. In Prague, that’s possible to do, of course, but not as fun. Sure, there are major concert ticket portals like www.ticketpro.cz for scheduled, international or regional acts, but when it comes to day-to-day great music you’ll be hard-pressed to find better alternatives than wandering into one of my favorites (if I tell you about these, you’ve got to promise to save me a seat):

POZOR! (Beware!): Singing and/or dancing can occur at any time in most of Prague’s evening-oriented establishments.

Prague's Feast On The Street

Jason Mashak — Sun, 15 Mar 2009 11:40:00 GMT

Photo: Alex Kehr

Since I love languages, my own and ones I’ve tried to learn, a little rhyming phrasal gem like “Prague kebab, Prague kebab” can stay on my tongue for days, balanced by the sauces of cool tzatziki and sweet hot chili.

Any rural town can offer chain eateries with ingredients shipped from a central warehouse in the middle of the continent. But independent ethnic 'fast food' – gyros, falafel, pizza, etc. – makes a city a city, the smells and flavors that make me repeat “Prague kebab, Prague kebab” to the rhythm of my footsteps when I need a meal at 1:30 in the morning before taking a taxi home… the best way to settle the stomach before morning.

Photo: GloomyCorp

The nature of any small business can be inconsistent, and Prague’s kebab joints are no exception. Open hours are based on ‘Prague time,’ which means that clocks are a general guideline for opening/closing times (for strict adherence to clocks, visit Germany instead). Fortunately, there are a lot of these places scattered throughout the center. If I find one of these establishments closed, the others are within a 5–10 minute walk from each other.

Beyond The Grave #5: Radlice & The Unknown Jewish Cemetery

Jason Mashak — Fri, 02 Sep 2011 08:11:00 GMT

Is it strange, when visiting a vibrant city, to seek out the local dead? Why do cemeteries – full of old stones and ancient history - attract so many modern travelers? Momondo asked our city bloggers to unearth an explanation and give us the low-down on the neighborhood necropolis. You'll read about the best burials in Berlin, the most entertaining interments in Prague, the graves of American heroes in New York and a cemetery with a magnificant view of Istanbul plus tips on what JP Sartre likes on his Paris grave and about Soeren Kierkegaard's and Karl Marx's last resting places in Copenhagen and London. Are you ready to go beneath the surface?

Radlice and the unknown jewish cemetry

The Jewish Cemetery in Josefov Photo: Megatick

My Prague guidebooks told me many times about Prague’s Old Jewish Cemetery in Josefov (Jewish Quarter), as well as two others in Zizkov district: Olsany Cemetery, built for plague victims in the 1600s (and later burial place of Jan Palach, the Czechoslovak philosophy student who lit himself on fire to protest the effects of the 1968 Russian invasion), and the New Jewish Cemetery, where Franz Kafka now resides (as a bug!).

After living a while in Prague, I realized that a more authentic cultural experience could be found in the smaller, hidden cemeteries scattered around town.

Two of my favorite cemeteries are in my own hillside neighborhood of Divci Hrady, in southwest Prague.

Prague, City Of...... Nature?

Jason Mashak — Tue, 28 Jul 2009 09:32:00 GMT

Photo: Hyunlab

After living six months in the center of Prague, a couple blocks from Karlovo namesti (Charles Square), I found myself needing to get closer to nature. Reasons were tenfold, the foremost being that my girlfriend and I needed better sleep than we were allowed downtown, due primarily to drunk tourists at 3:00am straining to reach the high notes of Beatles songs outside our windows.

Topless Summer in Prague

Jason Mashak — Thu, 21 Jul 2011 12:17:00 GMT

Summer is up and cities across the globe have planted palm trees and trucked in tons of sand to urban riverfronts to create the feeling of a lazy day at the shore. Urban beaches are a hit and Momondo guides you to our favourites.

Prague

As the heart of Europe, Prague is known for many things – gothic architecture, pilsner, beautiful ladies, et al. – but its beaches are often overlooked as a means of cooling off on a hot summer day. Sure, cold pilsner pints help, but sometimes cool water and a socially acceptable reason to be semi-naked take off the edge off of summer. Like most Prague establishments, beer and food are typically available, and like many Prague parks, don’t stare and drop your tongue if you see ladies sunbathing topless. Dog-friendly Prague draws a line in the sand regarding canines, so remember to leave Spikey back at the flat, hotel, or hostel. Beach admission rates vary according to peak times and/or services used, and some locations offer reduced rates after 5:00pm.

Bohemian Days & Nights of Autumn

Jason Mashak — Tue, 08 Sep 2009 10:33:00 GMT

Photo: czechian

Autumn in the Czech Republic is an especially magical time of year, maintaining an old-world charm, as the harvests of the surrounding countryside can’t help but influence a spirit in the cities and towns that is characterized by music and great food and wines, which are the foundation of traditional Czech celebrations.